The rants of a 25-years-old teenager

If there’s one thing I know about myself is that I didn’t grow up just yet. I’m still a silly girl that blushes when she gets a compliment and denies it immediately instead of saying “thanks” like a normal 24 year old woman would do. Or would she? I don’t know. I don’t understand women either. Hashtag b****es be crazy.

However, this is not about compliments or anything like that. I’m just at a point where I’m trying to figure things out but I know for sure that everyone does it no matter the age, even though there are so many expectations people have of me and young people in general. Sit up straight, take your elbows off the table, don’t talk with your mouth full, don’t burp in public, don’t pick your nose, stop pointing with your finger. So. Many. EXPECTATIONS, amirite?

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I’m just talking about all these expectations of how I should have a stable job that could develop a career (OK, I’m on it). That I should be buying an apartment and stop paying rent (WHY?). That I should think about what I’ll be doing in the next 5 years (uhm, videos on Dubsmash, d’ooh!). That I should have an opinion about everything (OK, fine, Rihanna doesn’t always deserve to be on the best dressed section). That I should give up my dream of becoming a YouTube celebrity and focus on “some real goals” (NO.). That I should stop pointing with my finger at things (but you’re not looking where I’m telling you to look!).

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One day, our heads are going to explode of so many thoughts caused by our judgmental consciousness that Steven Spielberg will start crying because he didn’t get the time to make a Vine out of it, I tell you. Or post it on Meerkat, we’re evolving over here (also, you’re welcome, I educated you a little).

One moment it’s “don’t worry, you have your life ahead of you”, the next one is “so, your resume says you had 5 jobs already?… Isn’t this doubting?” Yeah, it is doubting. Like that Hawaiian shirt you’re wearing. What is this, casual Friday? (That was me talking to a virtual interviewer, FYI).

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I’ll be 25 in 2 weeks. And I don’t know where I’m at. All I want to do is finish reading Amy Poehler’s book, listen to The Weeknd, scroll on Tumblr and visit London. I’m serious about these 4 things being on the top of my priority list. What does that say about me? Doesn’t matter.

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Actually, the cold always bothered me. But I do love Olaf ^_^.

OK fine, I’ll stop ranting. No top 10 things I learned while being 25 anymore. I have a cat now and it takes up all of my time for blogging. Just kidding, it doesn’t, I just don’t want to write.

Byyyeeeeee.

 

All gifs via Google Images

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I don’t know what I’m doing.

I have no idea what I’m doing.

That’s probably something anyone could say, really, because I don’t believe there is a single person in this world who can say they know what they’re doing for a 100%. This probably doesn’t make any sense now. I know. But for the n* time in my life I wish I knew what I was doing, because uncertainty is a bitch. And this quote is actually somewhere on Tumblr, with a nature picture on the background. Damn hipsters ruin everything.

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Anyway. Yes, I hate not knowing, and except for those people I like to call “fools” who love not knowing what life is about and write about it on Medium, I don’t know any persons who feel different from me. I mean, of course they’re different, I was just emphasizing the other part.

I mean, it’s probably okay, right? It’s okay, I guess, because if everybody feels that way, then you’re not supposed to feel alone in this, right? Like… When you’re asking yourself why do you feel so lonely on a Sunday when all you did was eat, read, watch 2 movies and take care of your cat, it’s okay not to know why. Or like when you find yourself crying in the middle of the night for no reason, it’s okay not to know, right? I’m sure everyone does that. And I’m also sure that by making these last 2 sentences sound like funny examples, no one will take me seriously. And if they do, they’ll probably say something like “it’s not okay to share this, you know”. No, I actually don’t know.

I also don’t know what depression is. When I don’t find my answers to those questions above that sounded funny but aren’t, I go and say “Oh, it’s just because I’m a little depressed” or “Woo hoo, spring asthenia is kicking in”. And yes, it’s probably true, but the fact is, it’s not a diagnosis given by a doctor. It’s just stupid Tumblr posts and 2 movies on a Sunday afternoon. And that’s because nobody really cares about finding out what it is that they’re doing. Assuming is a lot easier, and taking others seriously is something people in general cannot deal with. Meaning “no, depression is not a real thing”. It’s just the weather, pollution, the situation in Iraq and the kids in Africa. That’s probably why we can’t have nice things.

You have to be kinda selfish to be depressed. And in times like these, you do not want to even seem selfish.

Not okay to share stuff like this on the Internet, why should people know, right? You know what? People have to just deal with it. It’s the same as swearing on the Internet. Sure, they don’t like hearing it, but it’s part of language. And of culture, if I may say so. You know that if you swear, someone could feel offended, and that’s because they actually feel uncomfortable. Why spear them? Why keep feelings to yourself when they mean something? Why not just call things as they are and as a reaction to people who do that, pay some respect and show trust?

It’s better if we don’t know, though. Ignorance is bliss.  Right?

Right.

 

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The distraction Gifs come from giphy.com. Yeah, I bothered. 

Men are crazy

Yes, you read that right. It doesn’t say “women” for some reason, although that one could also make a lot of sense as well. We all know that, feminist remarks aside.

The dating world is weird, I’ll give it that. But how can men complain about women being crazy when they are in the same mental condition? [Woo hoo, we’re equal. Yey feminism]. I’m not gonna talk about men’s expectations, because everybody has their own choices and can be as picky as they like, and they’re at the same far fetched level as women’s expectations of men. Referring to straight people here, thanks for noticing. What I am going to mention is the fact that men have lost their “touch”. And I’m really sorry if some crazy a** chicks did that to your brains, but why can’t anyone take a hint anymore, amirite?

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It goes a little something like this.

Every single time I say I like someone, I immediately hear the line: “Well, then, do something about it!”

And that line gives me such a boost I could climb Mount Everest dressed in a swim suit because I’m that awesome!

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Bulls**t. What I do is actually try and make things happen. You know, like starting conversations, laughing at his jokes (even if they’re not the funniest…), asking about his day. You know, PAYING ATTENTION. All this while at the same time giving him the chance to do something himself. Because since we’re all equal here (…), why the hell am I the only one trying? Take a hint. Act your part. Do something.

Another line I get when I say I like someone is: “Well, then, talk openly about it!”

And that line gives me such a boost that I could swim all the way to a deserted island and save a tribe from hunger!

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Bulls**t. Of course you can’t  address it, because when you openly talk about it, they say you’re crazy and that you’re too blunt and that they like a little mystery in a woman. Plus, where’s the thrill of “the hunt”?

Just make up your mind, men. Really now.

It’s not just women who are crazy. Women would be just fine with adapting to whatever men want, seriously. Because that’s what they’ve been doing so far. Look it up in history books.

To let you in a little secret: all women want is attention. In any form. A look from across the bar in a club. A text saying “Hi” or “Hello, gorgeous.” (depends on your preferences… I ain’t judging… that much) or anything with proper grammar. Opening the car door. Asking for help. It’s the same sh*t anyone would ask for anyway, because it’s called common sense.

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P.S. No, this is not about the friendzone. That is a concept that has been invented by some fraternity dudes who couldn’t possibly think all you can be with a girl is just friends. You know, college. And as I remember correctly, I’m not in college anymore.

Because we all grow up, thank the Universe.

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Don’t judge me.

*all giphs from giphy.com*