So a while a go I wrote a post about the real things you need to know by the time you turn 24. This is the sequel. I had pretty great insights on that one, but then again this blog isn’t bringing me any money, so I’m glad for nothing. Oh, wait. It’s called personal branding. I just said that. Yeah. Now more people are reading my shenanigans (
I’ve been waiting for an occasion to write this word in like forever), hooray! …
Moving on, here are some more things you need to know in order to succeed at life by my judgement, if you ever cared about my opinion.
1. Know what gifts to buy for your friends. I suck at buying gifts, too. It’s ok. Don’t feel embarrassed or anything. It’s ok if you give the “wrong” gifts to people. They will smile and say “thank you” even if they don’t like it so much. Just the way you do it. But you can fix this. Seriously. A mug is not a really good idea, and God knows I made that rookie mistakes oh so many times. Also, never soap. There are other ways to show somebody they need to take a shower. Like, actually telling them or something. (Life hack: check their Pinterest boards and Tumblr accounts).
2. Pay your phone bills on time. Or just wait for people to call you, you selfish prick. (This might be a little monologue, fyi). And any other bills, I might add. It’s this thing called responsibility, I guess…
3. Be judgmental. I mean, where would you be right now if you weren’t judging things the right way? It’s not about gossiping, and it’s not about being mean. It’s about figuring out who you want to hang out with, who you want to work with and having your own opinions. For yourself. For your own little life. All that is made through a judgment, amirite? As you might have noticed, I disagree with people who say “don’t judge” or whatever. I mean, how did you survive on this planet? Who made decisions for you?
4. Make some friends and keep them close. Don’t be that guy who stays in all day and does nothing, but has so many opinions about how the world should be, when in fact you’re not getting the point. Friends help you overcome that. They help you have a better and clearer version about the world, which probably should be a certain way, but at least now you know you’re not too lost. Because your only opinion is never enough to make a good judgment. (Oh my God, where did that come from, brain?)
5. Help someone. Start small: family, friends, acquaintances. I don’t know if they need help, but they might be out of gas and really close to your place. Go pick them up or something. I don’t know, I don’t drive.
6. Party. Ooooow yeaaaaah. Party. Do I really have to say something about this? I mean, you’re 24, why not party? And before you go out, just do this. Badumtss.
7. Eat when you’re hungry, drink water when you’re thirsty. Heard that from a Belgian dude from my Erasmus group and it got stuck in my mind. But pizza is always a good idea, even if you’re not necessarily hungry. Just sayin`.
8. Get some general knowledge. Capitals of the world, kids in Africa, life in Korea. That kind of stuff. Google is very good at providing that kind of information. And so is Facebook, if you know your way ’round it.
9. Stand up for yourself, this being a memento I need to stick to my forehead or something. But yeah, think about it. You don’t have to clean someone else’s shoes if it’s not your job. Say it.
10. Don’t take yourself too seriously. This blog post is just my criteria of judging the people I wanna hang out with. You pass if you check all of the above. Just kidding, I don’t judge. Just kidding again.
*again, all gifs from giphy.com* *it’s golden* *i love gifs*
Don’t judge me.