The rants of a 25-years-old teenager

If there’s one thing I know about myself is that I didn’t grow up just yet. I’m still a silly girl that blushes when she gets a compliment and denies it immediately instead of saying “thanks” like a normal 24 year old woman would do. Or would she? I don’t know. I don’t understand women either. Hashtag b****es be crazy.

However, this is not about compliments or anything like that. I’m just at a point where I’m trying to figure things out but I know for sure that everyone does it no matter the age, even though there are so many expectations people have of me and young people in general. Sit up straight, take your elbows off the table, don’t talk with your mouth full, don’t burp in public, don’t pick your nose, stop pointing with your finger. So. Many. EXPECTATIONS, amirite?

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I’m just talking about all these expectations of how I should have a stable job that could develop a career (OK, I’m on it). That I should be buying an apartment and stop paying rent (WHY?). That I should think about what I’ll be doing in the next 5 years (uhm, videos on Dubsmash, d’ooh!). That I should have an opinion about everything (OK, fine, Rihanna doesn’t always deserve to be on the best dressed section). That I should give up my dream of becoming a YouTube celebrity and focus on “some real goals” (NO.). That I should stop pointing with my finger at things (but you’re not looking where I’m telling you to look!).

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One day, our heads are going to explode of so many thoughts caused by our judgmental consciousness that Steven Spielberg will start crying because he didn’t get the time to make a Vine out of it, I tell you. Or post it on Meerkat, we’re evolving over here (also, you’re welcome, I educated you a little).

One moment it’s “don’t worry, you have your life ahead of you”, the next one is “so, your resume says you had 5 jobs already?… Isn’t this doubting?” Yeah, it is doubting. Like that Hawaiian shirt you’re wearing. What is this, casual Friday? (That was me talking to a virtual interviewer, FYI).

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I’ll be 25 in 2 weeks. And I don’t know where I’m at. All I want to do is finish reading Amy Poehler’s book, listen to The Weeknd, scroll on Tumblr and visit London. I’m serious about these 4 things being on the top of my priority list. What does that say about me? Doesn’t matter.

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Actually, the cold always bothered me. But I do love Olaf ^_^.

OK fine, I’ll stop ranting. No top 10 things I learned while being 25 anymore. I have a cat now and it takes up all of my time for blogging. Just kidding, it doesn’t, I just don’t want to write.

Byyyeeeeee.

 

All gifs via Google Images

Men are crazy

Yes, you read that right. It doesn’t say “women” for some reason, although that one could also make a lot of sense as well. We all know that, feminist remarks aside.

The dating world is weird, I’ll give it that. But how can men complain about women being crazy when they are in the same mental condition? [Woo hoo, we’re equal. Yey feminism]. I’m not gonna talk about men’s expectations, because everybody has their own choices and can be as picky as they like, and they’re at the same far fetched level as women’s expectations of men. Referring to straight people here, thanks for noticing. What I am going to mention is the fact that men have lost their “touch”. And I’m really sorry if some crazy a** chicks did that to your brains, but why can’t anyone take a hint anymore, amirite?

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It goes a little something like this.

Every single time I say I like someone, I immediately hear the line: “Well, then, do something about it!”

And that line gives me such a boost I could climb Mount Everest dressed in a swim suit because I’m that awesome!

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Bulls**t. What I do is actually try and make things happen. You know, like starting conversations, laughing at his jokes (even if they’re not the funniest…), asking about his day. You know, PAYING ATTENTION. All this while at the same time giving him the chance to do something himself. Because since we’re all equal here (…), why the hell am I the only one trying? Take a hint. Act your part. Do something.

Another line I get when I say I like someone is: “Well, then, talk openly about it!”

And that line gives me such a boost that I could swim all the way to a deserted island and save a tribe from hunger!

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Bulls**t. Of course you can’t  address it, because when you openly talk about it, they say you’re crazy and that you’re too blunt and that they like a little mystery in a woman. Plus, where’s the thrill of “the hunt”?

Just make up your mind, men. Really now.

It’s not just women who are crazy. Women would be just fine with adapting to whatever men want, seriously. Because that’s what they’ve been doing so far. Look it up in history books.

To let you in a little secret: all women want is attention. In any form. A look from across the bar in a club. A text saying “Hi” or “Hello, gorgeous.” (depends on your preferences… I ain’t judging… that much) or anything with proper grammar. Opening the car door. Asking for help. It’s the same sh*t anyone would ask for anyway, because it’s called common sense.

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P.S. No, this is not about the friendzone. That is a concept that has been invented by some fraternity dudes who couldn’t possibly think all you can be with a girl is just friends. You know, college. And as I remember correctly, I’m not in college anymore.

Because we all grow up, thank the Universe.

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Don’t judge me.

*all giphs from giphy.com*

The one with the bucket list.

First things first: I know you’re not supposed to put a full stop at the end of a title, but I’m a rebel that way. In your face, rules.

So yeah, anyway, even if I have 2 posts that I’ve been postponing for a while (I kind of complain in one of them so you’re better off for now; and by you, I mean you 5 readers that follow this God forsaken blog that not even my friends read), but I was just watching one of Anna Akana’s videos on YouTube where she talks about her bucket list. And as I am a grown up now, who just realized she hasn’t really accomplished anything so far *cough cough*, I had the epiphany of writing a bucket list.

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The thing is, I’m sorry if I disappoint anyone, but it’s not your bucket list, mkay? And also, it’s not an usual one, like “things to do before I die”, but more like “things I want to accomplish in  life”. (Look at me being all dramatic and shit). And you’re not getting it all. I do have a private life, Facebook. Trust me, I do.

Here goes nothing.

1. Write at least 10 items of my bucket list on my blog. 

Haha, gotcha.

2. OK, I’ll be serious on this one: get a best friend and really try to keep him/her by my side for as long as possible, ’til death do us part. I’ve been going back and forth with my friends, always having trouble with staying best friends with someone. Fights, distance, disappointment can always happen, but I keep trying because I know there’s someone out there. Or just a cat, amirite?

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3. Figure out what I want to with my life and start doing it. Like I said, I don’t feel like I have done something important in my life so far. It’s really hard for me to answer the question “What are you most proud of?” when I hear it in job interviews or people I’m working or networking with.  So I go with superficial answers to quickly cover up. Therefore, I’m really determined to find what I’m good at, and yes, that is a very valid bucket list item, even if I’m 50 when I find it.

4. Wow, 4 already? Kewl. Visit New York city. My friends are probably bored hearing this over and over again, but I really want to see the filthy streets of NYC, and inhale the fresh air in the subway or stumble upon the rats at the corner of the streets where people throw their garbage. There’s just something romantic about that, you know?

5. Fall in love. I will not talk about this, though, I just mentioned it so people would think I’m romantic. Which I’m not. Don’t judge me. *listening to Omarion in the background* *I got this ice box blah blah blah*

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6. Start a damn YouTube channel already. One day, man. ONE. DAY.

7. Help someone out. No one has ever thanked me for helping so far, and that’s because I didn’t feel like I was doing them a favor or helping them out either, probably. And I also believe we are a little selfish when we do something just to hear a “thank you” back. And that’s not the kind of help I’m willing to give.

8. Get a tattoo. I’ll probably regret it for the rest of my life, but I actually want one. Pain, yeah, bring it!

9. Live in another country for at least a year. Work, have a life, meet new people, cry on Skype when talking to mom, that sort of stuff.

10. Whew, 10 already. Hmm, I give number 10 to drinking more water. Sounds like a New Year’s resolution, but hey, it’s for great health, and I need great health in order to fulfill the rest 90 things on my bucket list that you have no idea about. Hah. Told you I have a life outside Facebook!

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I’m sorry. I took all the gifs from Google Images and I didn’t bother to get the URL for each one.